Yes, you can be happy too!
How to be happy is a popular search and there are no surprises there.
Happiness is a vast topic and a very important one too. Especially right now, too many of us feel we’re not as happy as we can be or should be.
Though it may be true that happiness is different for each of us, it’s also very true and maybe more so; that there are certain things we can all do as humans to make happiness a little more achievable every day.
I believe these things are universal truths because we all are human and have more in common than we may know.
A lot of what affects our emotions may be due to what is being neglected at the human need level and not so much our own desires and wishes that are not being fulfilled.
Here’s how to be happy:
1- Smile When You Can.
I say smile when you can, meaning when the opportunity has come, embrace it with a smile.
I’ve found that if I fully appreciate my blessings and express joy and be grateful for them then that propels me to take joy in moments that trouble my heart.
Then it becomes so much easier to smile more throughout the day or when a smile may not come so easily.
Smiling is not just for those who see it, it’s primarily for the person doing it.
It’s your facial muscles that will be more relaxed because you smiled. And the dopamine your body will receive and benefit from. So you see, it’s you that will feel and benefit from a smile before another who sees and benefits too.
The great thing about doing what is good even when it is intended for someone else is that we benefit from that good first.
Because, even if your smile is not returned positively as it should be, you still benefit and no one can take its goodness from you.
After all, you can’t be good to others if you can’t be good to yourself first.
And this is where true joy lies, knowing you are doing good for good’s sake. Then a true sense of self-worth and esteem will fill your heart.
2- Communicate Clearly
Too often we find ourselves having to speak more when we would prefer to say less.
No one likes to repeat themselves over and over again, but we all do it daily with our loved ones. The very people we love but we just can’t deal with in that time due to some reason or another; sometimes we simply can’t be bothered to talk or explain.
The problem is, the very thing we want to avoid is what we end up doing more of because we’re not doing it properly to begin with.
I’ve always found if I communicate something clearly once then I don’t need to repeat and exhaust myself or the other person.
So here are some tips to communicate clearly:
- Make sure you have their attention fully, they should be in the same room as you, and engaged with you…not on their phone…give them time to prepare if need be but don’t talk to them whilst they’re distracted or simply not there.
- Break it down, make it simple, and use words they will understand.
- Consider who you are talking to, their age, and how they understand things. This will make it easier for you to explain in a way they will understand too.
- Don’t give details that are not needed especially if the topic is lengthy already. Keep to the point so that you can keep their attention.
- Ask if they understood, only they can tell you that. So ask and you can make it easier and save yourself and them the frustration.
When communication becomes easier for us to do, our relationships become richer and thus our day goes more smoothly, making happiness more achievable than before.
3- Stretch It Out
We are all aware that exercise(workout/ walking…sports..) is good for us, we all know we should do more of it and how every time we did, we felt better about ourselves.
Start with stretching it out daily, a basic stretch routine, 5 mins or less, to get you warm and comfortable. Who knows maybe it will lead to a workout but either way the least you can do for yourself is stretch and let the feeling of goodness lead you to more.
It’s always a good idea to refresh our minds about the benefits of eating well, or keeping active …not having too much junk… watching too much tv…you get the point.
Because knowledge is power; this will prompt you to try again to achieve these goals, for me, it is not about how many times I tried but failed, it’s about whether or not am still trying.
That’s what makes me different from everyone else and makes becoming happy a little more possible.
Do what you can, maybe you can’t do a full workout and that’s fine.
What am saying is, focus on doing the least of something and slowly build yourself, but never let go of the least of it.
That way you can feel decent and not miserable.
4- Talk/ Connect With Family ( Visit Plenty)
What would life be without family….without the humming of siblings in the background or the closing and opening of doors early in the morning…well actually we could all do with less of that. No honestly, the warmth and colors of life come from our near and dear ones. Our family.
And nothing has taught us( collectively) the value of family more than Covid. It is etched in our nature to be near our loved ones and to only fully thrive within those positive relationships.
Fun fact, the Arabic word for human is Insaan, and its etymology( where it originated from) some argue is from the Arabic word Uns; meaning sociability/ intimacy/ familiarity.
Before I go off on a tangent, connect, connect with your family. We live at an age where it’s encouraged to move away from family, to think friends are cooler than parents or siblings, or even the idea that living far and alone is correlated with moving in the right direction, I mean, why can’t you be responsible and successful with your family around nearby??
We have to make a firm intention that we will keep updated with our parents, keep our siblings in the loop.
And do our best to be present and prioritize them before other non-kin relationships.
This is the time to connect.
When so many forces are pushing us away from family, we need to find ways to bring them closer, let them in, forgive the mistakes and respect the differences.
“If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”
African Proverb
5- Forgive Before Sleep
We all have wronged, big and small.
We all need forgiveness for the past and what the future may bring.
I know I’ll make mistakes tomorrow, I just hope and intend it’s nothing major.
Being human means making mistakes. But being a good human means having the intention, and will to change for the better.
Am sure not a day goes by for most of us without someone annoying us or making us angry. If loved ones can do that then others in our day can do that moreso.
It’s going to happen.
So the aim can’t be to erase it because we can’t control others or the fact that they will make mistakes.
We have to help ourselves to regulate our emotions and thoughts, simply put; how we react to the hurt and deal with the situation is what’s important.
I’ve found this practice brings me a lot of peace, especially when I have no power to change or cause a change in someone or some situation.
Simply before going to sleep, last thing( amongst other things) before I close my eyes, I intend to forgive anyone that hurt or offended me during the day.
Whether they intended it or not, whether they realized it or not, and whether I have approached them about it or not.
Because before anything else, it’s my heart and mental health that I need to take care of first. This way tomorrow can be better than today and bring more joy by giving myself and others a new chance.
We all have a better chance at happiness when there’s less hate in our hearts.
HOLISTIC MUSLIMAH
If you enjoyed this check out other related posts >> Truths About Love – A Manifesto
